May 5, 2023
Our backyard neighbors had solar panels installed on their roof this week. As part of the installation, they had a large Black Walnut tree removed from their yard to allow the new panels as much direct sunlight as possible. I confess I never did like that tree.
The tree was old, and huge, and during windstorms its large branches would sway heavily. Occasionally a branch would break off and knock out electricity for our street. Some of the larger branches hung a bit too close to our roof for our liking. I had other reasons for giving that tree the side eye as well. I am deathly allergic to walnuts, and every fall it would drop hundreds and hundreds of walnuts into our back yard. Not only would I avoid going into the back yard during those times, but the size of the tree and number of walnuts dropped on the ground meant that, per doctor's orders, I could not grow vegetables for my own consumption in the yard because they would be tainted with walnut protein from the soil.
I was not heartbroken the day that tree came down.
And yet.
When looking out into my backyard now, I find myself noticing the place where the tree had reached into the sky with a bit of wistfulness. I suppose I'd grown accustomed to its big-branch creaking sounds, because it feels strangely quiet in my yard now. And I've seen squirrels running around the spot where it stood as if they're saying, "I swear, it was right here." I've wondered where they'll get their winter stash of food this year, without those hundreds and hundreds of walnuts.
I'm not sad that the tree is gone. But I appreciate what it was now, more than I did before, and I do wish I'd appreciated it a bit more when it was part of my landscape. Of course, my appreciation would not have made a difference for the tree, but it would have saved me some grouchy feelings toward a fellow inhabitant of God's Earth. The tree did nothing intentionally wrong, I realize, when it waved hello at me with heavy branches during windstorms and offered me gifts of walnuts.
My prayer for you this week is to find something to appreciate even in something you don't actually appreciate. The Book of Genesis tells us that God saw everything created as good. And the Psalmist reminds us to give thanks in all things. My prayer for you this week is to be able to look at the world around you with the eyes of God, and to give thanks even when (especially when?) thanks is not the first reaction. Changing our lens just might change our hearts. And if I can come to appreciate a walnut tree, just think what you can do with your God lens.